Spiritual Journal

As I was grabbing Riki's Bible this morning (if you recall, I got a free ESV and he liked it so now it's his - I'm praying for the day he wants to read it, although he did want to find me the scripture today, progress!!) I noticed my journal - it was a gift when I was baptised and I always thought it too pretty to write in but I started taking notes of spiritual events, such as being baptised in the Holy Spirit, speaking in tongues, and any particular visions, dreams or prayers I've felt compelled to pray.

From dayspring.com

Anyway, I was writing up the prophecy I received yesterday (here) and I flicked back through the very few pages I've filled. It seems that there is something of a confirmation, even in those four or five short pages.

Back in October 2010 (I hadn't written in it since then) I wrote that I was praying with two wonderful ladies from church, I love them dearly and we were in the Alpha group together - one of them is the lovely Auntie Joan who was my Sunday school teacher right from being a tiny toddler. I went up to chat to them before the meeting andthey prayed with me as I had convinced myself the enemy had convinced me that my gift of tongues was merely made up jibberish and that in praying with them, masquerading them as a heavenly language, I was offending God. Joan and Susan prayed with me and as we were praying, I felt myself at first stooped over but then straightening up until I was really tall and towering over everyone.

Obviously, I don't think that was a Joseph moment where everyone's stars were bowing down to me. To be honest it was an odd sensation and something I'd never experienced before, so I made a note of it.

The next night I was in the shower and I felt the Lord saying "I will raise you up". Again, as I've said before on numerous occasions, I was concerned that this was just me. I noted it down just in case but also wrote beside it that I recall something about God saying, "I will raise up men and women of excellence" - I could never find a scripture to back it up, though.

That same night, I felt a pull to pray for revival in England. Our church have been praying and desperately seeking revival in the Dearne Valley (the area we live in). I felt awful that I wasn't praying the same prayer but my heart was on our nation.

I've quite often prayed and sat in sorrow at the state of England. We are a Christian nation but prayer has been taken out of our schools. In fact, Jesus has been taken out of our schools. No longer do we have Christmas concerts and Nativity plays; we have "winter festivals" in fear of offending someone or other. I remember standing behind our chairs in the dining hall at Primary chool, not being allowed to sit until we, collectively as a school had said grace:

From thecrowcottage.com

"Thank You for the world so sweet

Thank You for the food we eat

Thank You for the birds that sing

Thank You, God, for everything

Amen"

I'm only 24 years old - this is less than 15 years ago - it's amazing how much things can change in such a short time!

I always said that as much as I'd love to be a teacher (see this post) - it's something I keep returning to, regardless of how many times I get set back - I can't work in a place where I can't share the love of God, instead having to teach about Diwali and Ramadan and throwing Halloween parties. I just can't bring myself to do it. I'd love to work in a Christian school (I fell in love with Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry when I discovered it) but alas, I live in England and we have a distinct lack of these schools over here! If it is in God's will for me to be in that kind of place, I know He'll pave the way for me.

I forget what my point was - the soapbox is firmly away for now! - but really, a journal is a great idea because it helps to see correlations and when we think there's no confirmation of a particular idea or desire, they might just show that there is.

Don't let the enemy get into your head and confuse and condemn you. In Christ Jesus there is no condemnation! If you have desires that surpass your own strengths and expectations - chances are, they're from God, and He delights in sharing them with you. Ask Him for confirmation, by all means - Gideon put out fleeces for God (Judges 6:37-40) and he went down as being one of the "heroes of the faith" (Hebrews 11:32) but when you receive that confirmation, accept it and start running toward it!

Be blessed, and excited!
-Lisa