This morning I went to church for the first time in around eight weeks. (I haven't been able to drive after surgery on my foot). What a great morning to return. The first meeting of the new year and the worship was great (albeit missing a drummer - you all know how much I love the drums). Pastor's message was just right; just what I needed anyway - he was talking about God's plan and having a vision for our lives. How we should keep going after it and striving for it.
Cut to the end of the meeting and Pastor had some news to share. His brother, a member of our Pastoral team, was leaving. He and his family are trusting in God and are preparing to go wherever He leads them. They have no idea where this may be but are living in total faith.
Obviously it's difficult when someone important moves on to pastures new, but I wasn't expecting to be as devastated as I was. I'm still not sure why it affected me so much. I love the whole family dearly and they are such an integral part of our church. I always say that my church is unique because there's genuine love there. A lot of churches have a loving and compassionate congregation but as I've said before, as soon as I walk in the door I feel and sense the love we have for one another. It's really beautiful - as cliche as it sounds, I truly feel like part of a family.
I think it's so important to have people in life, whether they're family, friends, colleagues, or fellow believers, who we can chat to, ask questions, and generally turn to in times of need. In my life I have a few people I can rely on but when it comes to matters of faith, I find myself turning to this family. I have a lot of questions and I've learned so much from each member of the five-strong family, at some time or another. Their teaching and messages have been some of the ones I'll remember for the rest of my life - it's not everyday that you respond so deeply to someone's words.
This made me think, though. How can we respond so differently to a word preached by one person, and the exact same word preached by someone else? How can we "prefer" one preacher over another? Aren't the messages coming from the same place?
I guess the way I look at it is this. In life we are naturally inclined to "click" with certain people more than others. Just think about your own life; I'll bet there's someone who, try as you might, you just can't seem to get on with. Now I'm not saying that I don't "like" other pastors or preachers; just that I respond more to some than others.
Another thing is the style of preaching. The way that the message is written and delivered is important and I personally enjoy a teaching style, where I can make notes to refer back to later. I like it to have a structure that makes sense and I like to have an idea of what's coming.
It's not every day, every week or even every year that a message is delivered in such a way that it stirs my soul and resonates so deeply that I know, even at the very moment of hearing it, that I will remember it for the rest of my life. In fact I can probably count on one hand the people who have the ability to provoke such a strong response from me. It's a gift and I would imagine that there are lots more people out there with this gift, but they aren't aware. They think that because they're not ministers or pastors, that they can't possibly get up and share a message they've prepared, even if that message has come directly from God, through His Holy Spirit. That's a huge shame. Imagine what the world could be if we all took a small step of faith.
My church is a powerful place. It's the place where the Spirit of God resides and is so tangible that sometimes, it can take your breath away. It can reduce us to tears; have us rolling around the floor in laughter; can shock us with prophetic words and signs and wonders. I have even been in a meeting, one Sunday night, where the evangelist didn't even share his message. The atmosphere so heavy with with the Spirit of God that we were all silent. Nobody dared to, or wanted to, speak. Nobody wanted to leave either! Eventually we all got into a huge laughing fit and it was as if we were watching a stand-up comedian - but the only one moving was the Spirit!
I love my church but I understand that this isn't a place for everyone to stay forever. We have to make space for others to experience it, and at the same time, allow the next generation of leaders, evangelists, prophets and ministers to step out in faith, showing the world how they have grown in their knowledge and faith. Allowing them to complete the work that had been intended for them all along.
I'm beginning to think of it as a training establishment, and sometimes we have to be grateful for the short time that we have access to such amazing men and women of God, but then we have to allow them to move on and bless others. We have to shower them with prayer and blessings and pray that they continue in the path God has ordained for them. We have to loosen our grip on them and, in my case, our reliance. After all, it's not man or woman who has the answers; it's God! I just have to (literally) cut out the middle man now, and figure out how to hear from God by myself!
So yes, I'm saddened. In fact I feel like my heart could break, but I understand that it's part of God's plan and so I am happy for the family that we are losing today. Our loss is the Kingdom's gain and I hope that someday I might be on the other side, saying goodbye to my safe, comfortable life and stepping out in faith to follow God's plan for me... whatever that might be!
